Showing posts with label SELF-AWARENESS. Show all posts
Showing posts with label SELF-AWARENESS. Show all posts

Life Reflections and The Power of Looking Back: How Our Stories Shape Our Lives

We are all walking storybooks. Page by page, our lives unfold through experiences (good and bad), mistakes, victories, and lessons. Sometimes, we move so fast trying to reach the next goal that we forget to pause and reflect on the chapters we've already written.

But the truth is that our stories are more than memories. They are like maps, pointing to patterns, values, and truths. These are what guide and propel us forward.

In this cornerstone post for the Stories & Reflections category, we explore the deeper meaning of reflecting on personal stories, why they are important for emotional growth, and how to start writing or rewriting your narrative with intention.

Why Our Stories Matter More Than We Realise


We often think our past is a fixed sequence of events cast in stone, but our interpretation of those events is anything but. There lies the power of reflection. It allows us to re-evaluate, learn from it, and heal.

Whether it’s a story of heartbreak, career failure, childhood trauma, medical conditions, or unexpected joy, every story has its deep meaning. If nurtured, it can grow into deeper understanding, purpose, and even transformation.

Am I Going to Die? - A patient’s story about a dark time in her life.


What Do Our Stories Do For Us and How Do They Impact Our Lives?


  • They shape our identity. We define ourselves by what we’ve experienced in life.
  • They offer tools for growth. When we reflect on past challenges and how we overcame them, it builds resilience and confidence for future storms.
  • They connect us to others. Honest stories help others feel seen, heard, and less alone.

So why do we avoid reflection? Often, it's because we’re afraid of what we’ll find. But as inspirational writers, therapists, and spiritual guides remind us, the only way out is through telling our stories.

Personally, writing has helped me untangle some pains I had carried for far too long. I cried, I reflected, I forgave, and I grew stronger. Writing and sharing my stories became a turning point in how I saw myself.

Many times, writing our truth is more important than being heard.

Losing a Pet Is a Heart-Breaking Experience - Close to Twelve Years, But Just Like Yesterday


How to Begin Reflecting on Your Own Story


Reflection doesn’t necessarily require therapy or journaling, although they do help at times. However, you can begin reflection by asking yourself a simple question: “What is a moment in my life that changed me, and what has it taught me? Use the following framework to help guide you through reflective storytelling. 
  1. Choose a story that sticks. We all have moments we replay with pride, pain, or curiosity. That’s usually a sign that there’s more to let out.
  2. Break the story into parts. Like any good story, it should have a beginning (the situation), a middle (conflict or emotion), and an end(was it resolved or not?).
  3. What is your takeaway from it? Did it teach empathy, did it create space for reinvention, or something that made you start to believe in yourself?
  4. What do you want to do with the lesson taught?

The Science of Storytelling & Healing


Telling your story isn’t just emotional, but is also neurological. When we reflect on and reframe past experiences, we are rewiring our brains. This process is called neuroplasticity. It helps us:

  • Reduce anxiety and trauma triggers.
  • Strengthen self-awareness.
  • Build resilience.
  • Fosters our ability to manage our emotions.

In fact, narrative therapy is now a widely recognised tool in psychology that helps externalise problems, separating the person from the traumatic experience.

So yes, telling your story isn’t just expressive, it is also transformative.


And If the Story Still Hurts?


Some stories don’t have happy endings. Many don't. Some memories still sting, even many years later. So, if your story feels unfinished or unresolved, here's a gentle reminder:
  • Healing doesn’t mean forgetting. It means facing pain with more courage, clarity, and support than before.
  • It is okay to revisit the story over time. As you grow, your interpretation will shift, and so will its power over you.

Dads Who Abandon Their Kids are Scumbags, Period: And my father, God rest his soul, was one.


Letting the Story Shape Your Future


Stories only become transformative when they guide new decisions. Awareness is the first step to change. Here are a few ways to move from insight to impact:
  • Write a new narrative. Instead of feeling you've messed things up, try to learn from my mistakes and grow wiser.
  • Share your story through a blog, a voice note, or a conversation with a friend. Narrating your story out loud can be healing.
  • Practice self-compassion. Growth doesn’t come from shaming the past. Rather, it comes from understanding it.


Stories Worth Telling: A Closing Reflection


Your story matters, not because it's perfect, but because it is yours. In telling it, you just might find someone else who can relate to your story and see their own reflection in your words. Importantly:
  • Revisit your past with compassion.
  • Tell the truth, even if your voice shakes.
  • Let your story illuminate the path forward for you and others.
We are not just the things that happen to us. We are the stories we choose to tell.


Your Turn to Reflect and Share


Before you leave, take a moment to reflect on these three points:
  1. What’s one story you’ve never shared but has shaped who you are today?
  2. What would it feel like to write it down?
  3. Who might need to hear it?
Feel free to share your reflections in the comments or submit a guest story. We would love to feature your voice in this growing collection of lived wisdom.


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Best-Selling Self-Help and Motivational Books
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Best-Selling Self-Help and Motivational Books


"There is no better gift to yourself or another person than the gift of knowledge and understanding derived from wisdom." - Brian Michael Good

Today, people want to level up in life. They are eager to find ways to enhance their lives by boosting productivity, imbibing better habits, and trying to be the best versions of themselves through self-help.

Self-help books are all about helping us solve our most pressing problems. Issues can be anything from yearning for financial freedom to seeking lifestyle changes, improving relationships, desirous of entrepreneurial success, good health and well-being, and personal growth.
 
Despite tons of blogs and websites giving self-help advice, nothing beats having physical self-help books.
 
Physical books are a great source of researched and detailed information. They are also wonderful sources to pick up and refer to now and then, especially when you need to go back for a refresher or whenever you need a boost.

On the other hand, with online sites, the chances of losing visited web pages are pretty high unless you make concerted efforts to bookmark or perhaps store them in a notes app. And we know that once stored info sinks into the bottom of saved collections, poof, it's gone.

The Benefits of Owning Physical Self-help Books


While some people keep their books at close range - on a nightstand, kitchen countertop, or coffee table, others place them alongside other precious books on the bookshelf or in a bookcase for easy access. You can pick it up whenever you feel like it, to refer back to some forgotten points. You can do that today, tomorrow, next year, or in a decade. It may even become an heirloom.

A book remains forever the close go-to companion in quiet times.

When life ordeals and struggles stress us out and make us anxious and distressed, we can reach out for a physical book.

Books to Inspire, Motivate, Teach, and Help


While some people can find solace through personal advice or digital resources, most prefer to get advice from highly recommended books. And unlike wading through online pieces of advice and short-snippet quotes that you can lose in an instant if you don't store them immediately, you lose them. But books remain with you. They are long-lasting, and we must never forget that.


This must-have book will revitalise your life with 400+ quotes, all methodically laid out in 70 chapters. It encompasses and addresses a wide range of topics, including self-esteem and self-worth, as well as hardships, abuse, feelings, emotions, challenges, hindrances, and obstacles.



This book is the Holy Grail of success philosophy. It is the golden key to the author’s complete and unabridged mind-power method for achieving goals. After interviewing dozens of industrialists, diplomats, thought leaders, and successful people from all walks of life, the young Hill distilled what he learned into 15 core lessons, organised with an introductory chapter, 'The Master Mind,' that serves as a primer to Hill's overall philosophy.



Although pain is inevitable, suffering is optional. With this book, learn how to overcome anxiety, self-doubt and self-sabotage without needing to rely on motivation or willpower. Discover the root cause of all psychological and emotional suffering, and how to achieve freedom of mind to effortlessly create the life you've always wanted to live.



Are you looking to come out of the trauma/trigger time loop and begin living a life of abundance? Jeannine Rashidi guides you through her healing journey from 25 years of PTSD, trauma, and adverse life experiences in this easy-to-read true story. It will make you laugh, cry, reflect, and ultimately become you again. You will find your inner healer with fundamental best practices while learning a proven step-by-step process that has guided thousands of people out of the tight grips of their trauma.



In the wake of his retirement from professional basketball, Kobe “The Black Mamba” Bryant decided to share his vast knowledge and understanding of the game, taking readers on an unprecedented journey to the core of the legendary “Mamba mentality.” Citing an obligation and an opportunity to teach young players, hardcore fans, and devoted students of the game how to play it “the right way,” The Mamba Mentality takes us inside the mind of one of the most intelligent, analytical, and creative basketball players ever.

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Sudoku for Senior Citizens: Benefits of Playing Number Games

Sudoku is a popular traditional game that is strictly a logic-based combinatorial puzzle. It can become addictive in no time, but many players who are die-hard fans of the puzzle do not know how beneficial the number-placement game is to our brains, especially as we grow older.

Sudoku game - (Image used under license from iStockPhoto)

The word Sudoku means number allotted or the number that is single in Japanese and was first featured in a magazine called Nikoli in Japan in the late 80s.

How Sudoku Benefits Our Brain

Sudoku is fun to play and an awesome brain game. Its mental-stimulating qualities can help ward off a decline in brain function. And because it involves problem-solving and spotting patterns, playing the game helps stimulate the player's cerebral abilities, giving the brain immense satisfaction as if it just completed a complex task.

Beneficial for the Elderly

The University of Edinburgh in Scotland carried out research to study the benefits of the game. They discovered that the game triggers ordinarily dormant brain survival genes. According to the researchers, these survival genes make brain cells live longer and play a vital role in resisting diseases, disorders, and strokes. It is believed that the Sudoku game also helps prevent the advance of Alzheimer's disease. So, playing the game consistently as we age offers some comfort because of its therapeutic effects on the thought patterns that evolve while playing the game.

In a nutshell, the numbers game will:
  • Increase concentration power.
  • Allow a player to think strategically.
  • Stimulate the mind.
  • Give a sense of achievement.
  • Help you learn how to solve problems imaginatively.
  • Help delay/prevent the onset of dementia.
  • Protect the brain from a steady decline.
  • Help players increase their sense of time.
  • Improve memory.
  • Keep your mind sharp and alert.
  • Offer a form of exercise for the brain.
Finally, when you play Sudoku constantly and persistently, it may help to generate new brain cells.


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This Is What We Have to Do When We Start to Age

How true is it that we start to age around thirty-five? What does this mean? That, whatever the state of our health and wellness is, we begin to age slowly and steadily after the first three decades of our lives?
Well, it does sound logical, doesn’t it? But in reality, we can also say that we begin to age from the day we are born. So what’s the whole din about ageing?
 
If thirty-five years old is the yardstick, excuse me, but that is young, especially for us who are almost twice that age!

Stay happy and positive at all times, laugh a lot and have fun. (Image used under license from iStockPhoto)

If You are Over Fifty

To the 50+, this is the reality. Around the age of fifty, sometimes earlier, minor health issues start to rear their hydra-heads. If we are fortunate, the minor health issues won’t beat us down. If not, well… not-so-good. This is when we start to feel and see the subtle signs of ageing, great genes or not.
What to do to stop it? Nothing. However, slowing it down is easy.
 
Ageing well doesn’t always depend on luck. For a few, maybe. But for the large majority, we need to give it a nudge. Heaven helps those who help themselves.

Major Changes to Expect

As we age, we expect three major changes – body, physiological, and psychological.

Body changes
  • Wrinkles, like crow’s feet and fine lines.
  • Loss of skin elasticity.
  • Duller, drier, and thinner skin.
  • Age spots and open facial pores.
  • Skin tags.
  • Bad breath.
Physiological changes
  • Hypertension (high blood pressure).
  • Osteoarthritis.
  • Diabetes, or bronchial asthma.
  • Cataracts.
  • Anaemia and skin problems.
  • Cardiovascular.
Psychological changes
  • Depression.
  • Anxiety disorders.
  • Psychotic disorders.
  • Memory loss.
  • Empty nest syndrome.
  • Identity crisis.
  • Feelings of inferiority and hopelessness.

Here are 7 Simple Things to Do

  1. Eat well.
  2. Exercise regularly. Sweep, clean, mop, dust, etc. Regard house chores as good exercise. Forget treadmills, early morning jogs, planks and all. Doing that hard stuff is great. But you don’t have to.
  3. Take nutritional/dietary supplements. This is important. My daily supplement regimen includes vitamins C, A, E, and D. However, before you take any of these vitamins/supplements, discuss it with your doctor.
  4. Stay happy and positive at all times, laugh a lot and have fun.
  5. Be grateful for the great opportunity you have to live life.
  6. Love, love, and love people around you, whether they are family, friends, neighbours, or colleagues.
  7. Listen to music while you do your chores, cook, or whatever. Its therapeutic benefits are so underrated.
Ageing is a gradual process. However, ageing well is mainly about maintaining good health and making the right choices at the right time towards a fulfilling and healthy way of life. It is not solely an absence of sickness, challenges, or disorders.
 
Being well and fit doesn’t mean that we will be illness-free. Rather, wellness is an active and determined means towards change and self-growth. This can be described as a lifestyle of emotional, physical, psychological and general social well-being.
Health, Wellness, and Financial Well-Being at Sixty-Plus
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Effects of Fresh Flowers on Senior Citizens

Recent research on the effects of fresh flowers on humans has pointed out that senior citizens with a close relationship with flowers are known to have positive emotional feelings and a healthy disposition towards other people and life in general. And because the impact of flowers on them elicits happiness, endurance, and cheerfulness.


The research and study leading to these revelations was by a team led by Professor Jeannette Haviland-Jones, PhD, professor of psychology, at Rutgers in 2001. The Society of American Florists worked with the Rutgers study group to bring its flowers expertise into the study. The participants in the six-month study consisted of ten (10) men and ninety-four (94) women.

Study Methods Adopted

This article describes the process of flower research on seniors, the methods adopted and applied, and how and how they came to their conclusions.

Four study groups of 104 seniors (participants in the research) from different ethnic groups, backgrounds, and environments were constituted. Their ages ranged from 55 to 93 years. There were two groups - some received flowers while some did not. To avoid distorted or biased results, none of the participants knew the purpose of the study.

Each participant kept a personal log to record their daily social contacts, recent social outings, and other events. The journals had data on daily and weekly contacts with friends, family, doctors, neighbours, household helpers, religious friends, and churches.

The interviews followed the following process:
  • 1st interview - Data collating based on health status, lifestyle, social support, moods and demographic information.
  • 2nd interview - Testing and measuring changes in moods, behaviours, feelings and general health conditions of each senior citizen.
The participating seniors were split into four groups as follows:

1. Early Group

The early group received a flower bouquet once, immediately after an initial baseline interview. They had the flowers in time for a second interview.

2. Late Group

The late group received their flower arrangement once and before the last interview. These participants had their flowers in time for the third interview.

3. All-Flowers Group

The all-flowers group received flowers two times, once before the second interview and another before the third.

4. No-Flowers Group

This group received no flowers throughout the six-month study. They received a bouquet each at the end of the study.
 

After three interview sessions that lasted six months, the seniors were then tested daily on their memories, what they remember about the flowers, daily social contacts, and recent social events. The results were then compared with the daily logs they had compiled over the six months.

Impressive Results

Scores were given based on how specific, accurate, and detailed their answers were.
  • The number of times the seniors in each group received flowers.
  • At what point in the research did they receive flowers.
  • Changes in behaviour, their moods, and feelings.

Predictably, the all-flowers group was the happiest of all the study participants. There were more smiles and less depressive moods. When tested for more detailed recalls of their flowers and book entries, the most profound results of the flower therapy appeared. It showed that those who got the most flowers and received them in the early stages of the study demonstrated the best-retained memory. Additionally, the mood and spirit elevation lasted for several days.

Quoting Dr. Haviland-Jones, head of the study team, "Common sense tells us that flowers make us happy. Now, science shows that. Not only do flowers make us happier, but they also have strong positive effects on our emotional well-being". She concluded thus, "Happier people live longer, healthier lives and are more open to change. Our research shows that a small dose of nature, like flowers, can do a world of wonder for our well-being as we age".

The Overlooked Benefits of Fresh Flowers

The Rutgers senior citizens and flowers study gives us a clearer picture of our floral companions. It shows us how flowers and their benefits go unnoticed (probably) because they are so natural and beautiful, we feel that's all creation meant them to be.

Our pets of the plant world are to be admired and nurtured for therapeutic and emotional satisfaction. The benefits have, for the most part, been ignored in literature and talk about people and plants.

What we now know is that perhaps people might be the reason that flowers exist. Another wonder of creation meant for our use, and most especially for the happiness and well-being of our senior citizens.


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What Are Longevity Supplements and How Do They Work?



Is there anything like longevity supplements?

Are there dietary formulas that will make you live longer?

Do vitamins and health supplements guarantee a better quality of life?

Before I answer these questions, let me mention these salient points.

  • Habits and lifestyle are both connected. When we live a healthy life, our lifestyle is usually on the upside. But it is good to remind ourselves that barring unforeseen happenstances like accidents, sadness, emotional suffering, and hereditary disorders, once the parts of our body are protected, we can live a little longer, and have healthier lives.
  • Ageing is a process. Slowing down the skin ageing process, especially skin-wise relates to healthy eating and sleeping, no drugs and smoking, maintaining good body weight, keeping blood sugar in check, etc.
  • Protection from the harmful effects of sun exposure. The eyes need protection, and so does the skin and its elasticity; referring to sunglasses and sunscreen lotions.


Longevity Supplements for Resetting Biological Clocks?


There are no standalone longevity supplements that can add more years to our lives. Rather, there are dietary supplementation formulas that are antioxidants that will help destroy harmful free radicals that are the main cause of many diseases and disorders. Many are standalone nutrients that can be taken in combination with others. Examples include:

  • Grape seed extracts.
  • Japanese knotweed.
  • Red wine extract or concentrated red wine powder
  • Vitamins - C, B12, A, E, and K,
  • Minerals - magnesium, zinc, calcium, selenium and iron.
  • Plant matter - weeds like dandelion, stinging nettle, cleavers, and chickweed.

These nutrients, vitamins, minerals, and plant matter work wonders in regulating our cellular health by boosting and stimulating the mitochondria, the powerhouse of our cells, and promoting a longer life.

Which Ones to Take and How


Grape seed extract - anti-ageing and brain health. It slows down the skin ageing process, strengthens collagen formation, promotes great skin elasticity, and protects our body from the harmful effects of sun exposure.

Japanese knotweed - Perhaps the most renowned health benefit of Japanese knotweed is its positive effect on cognitive health. Neuroprotective (it reduces the risk of developing neurodegenerative diseases like Alzheimer’s, and cognitive and physical memory impairment.

Red wine extract - This has been shown to reduce inflammation and help with diabetes management. It guards against diabetes and treats diabetic patients by lowering blood sugar levels.
Vitamins

Vitamin C - Immune system booster. Antioxidant. Other benefits include helping the body to produce collagen, reduce the chances of osteoporosis, help absorb iron, and maintain bones, cartilage, and blood vessels.

Vitamin B12 - A nutrient that helps keep your blood and nerve cells healthy. It also helps prevent megaloblastic anaemia. Vitamin B12 is crucial to various bodily processes like the normal functioning of the brain and nervous system, and cerebral functioning (ability to think). It also helps create and regulate DNA.

Vitamin A - It helps the lungs, heart, kidneys, and other organs of the body work optimally. Vitamin A is also important for eye protection and improves night vision, the immune system, and growth and development.

Vitamin E - As an antioxidant, vitamin E is popularly known for protecting cells, tissues, and organs from damage caused by free radicals. It is also claimed to reduce the risk of some types of cancer, including lung, stomach, rectal, oral cavity, and prostate cancer.

Vitamin K - This group of compounds strengthens bones by helping make osteocalcin, which helps prevent low bone density. Whether it can treat or prevent bone problems is open to debate. However, some studies indicate that taking vitamin K reduces the risk of bone fractures and low bone density.

Minerals


Magnesium - Magnesium is a mineral that is essential for healthy muscles, nerves, bones and blood sugar levels. If you don't get enough magnesium in your diet over a long time, you may be at a higher risk of health problems such as heart attack, stroke, diabetes or osteoporosis.

Zinc - This is a nutrient found in the body that helps the immune system and the body's metabolic function. It prevents cell damage in the retina and may help delay the progression of age-related macular degeneration and vision loss.

Calcium - This nutrient is great for preserving bone health, especially in older people, and it plays a vital role in keeping the bones healthy and maintaining body strength. It is beneficial for muscle function, nerve transmission, and hormone secretion.

Selenium - It helps protect the body from the damage caused by oxidative stress, boosts the immune system, slows down age-related mental decline, and reduces the risk of heart disease.

Iron - Iron is important in making red blood cells, which carry oxygen around the body. A lack of iron can lead to iron deficiency anaemia.

Plant Matter

Your garden and backyard are nature's pharmacy. Weeds. Never underestimate the efficacy of certain weeds. Rather than see them as pesky nuisances, they are powerhouses of health, offering free, safe and effective remedies found just outside the front door.

They grow extensively in our yards, gardens and lawns. Typical examples are dandelion, stinging nettle, cleavers, and chickweed. They are not only edible, but they are also beneficial for health, offering natural remedies for everything from colds and allergies to skin conditions, inflammation, and blood sugar regulation.


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